Search This Blog

Sunday, June 20, 2010

One armed bandit

As my husband goes to pick up the daughter child and I have wee man down for a rest, I decide to try to be a good wife and do a few chores. It is Fathers Day after all. And he cleaned the living room, did laundry, and made the coffee this morning. Leaving me feeling unkind on his day. So I start the little things like getting bottles collected and washed. I get about this far when Aidan howls. And howls........and howls. It can be deafening. I do the now normal ritual of asking what his problem is and showing him I have not gone far from the playpen he is lounging in one room away. No luck. Still Mr. Pissy Pants. Scooping him up I assess the things I can do with one arm taken hostage by a young mancub. And after I finish this blog I will do these things.

Things I can do one handed:

-load bottled into the sanitizer and pop it in the microwave.

-beat the dog (or threaten with a shaken fist)

-make a pile of messy baby clothes that resembles 1/10 load of laundry in normal human size

-put in a hair clip to keep my bangs from dangling all stringy in my face and annoying me (a hot mess I am today)

-change the channel when music television puts on Nickleback *gag*

-clean up spilled formula

-pour a cup of coffee

-put away single items from the cluttered coffee table one trip at a time

-text message


Things I cannot do one handed:

-put hair in a ponytail

-pump breast milk ( hind sight being 20/20 I now realize why they invented that bar thingy that connects the two receptacles for the pumpy thingy. Should have bought that one. And I bet the gal that invented it is a bazzzillionair. Of course it would have been a woman, are you kidding me?)

-unload the bottles from the hot sanitizer thing. (hmmmm, two little latches didn't seem so hard to latch you'd think unlatching would be a sinch.)

-change my shirt after breast pump fiasko

-fold laundry

Man I hope he goes back to sleep.

More fun to come later when we go live to the scale as I do the daunting deed of finally checking on my weight!! Stay tuned!


  1. One thing I learned, and maybe you will too? Changing a diaper, one handed. Better yet? A blow out...oh yes. This Glynn has talent :)

  2. Sports bra with holes cut into them works for making pumping "no handed". Saved. My. Life.